Words by Megan
Saturday night (39 weeks) Lachy and I went out for the afternoon. We ended up at The Gem and had tacos for dinner, I remember posting our feast and writing ‘hopefully this is the last supper!’ It was.
Sunday morning I woke up and went to the toilet numerous times – if you know you know. I then projectile vomited 6 times in the shower and took myself to bed for the day, convinced I had food poisoning. I asked my mum if Poppy could stay at her house that night after she picked her up from her dad’s, I was really weak at this point. Lachy’s girls and family came for our other Poppy’s birthday dinner, she chose tacos and there was no way I could bring myself to eat Mexican again. I stayed in bed for the whole thing and about 8:30pm felt a bit better and came downstairs for some water and a dry biscuit. I kept pointing out how tight my braxton hicks were, I kept saying ‘there’s no way my body will go into labour I’m so weak it’ll just know it’s not a good time’. I went to bed about 10:30, Lachy stayed up a little longer. At 1am I woke up and he wasn’t in bed, I thought for gods sake imagine if my waters broke and I had to waddle down to get him and then I rang him. He came to bed about 1:15 and as I rolled over I felt more tightening but with a bit of kick, still a very dull pain but I’d never had pain with my braxton hicks before, it was different. They kept happening and after a little while I kept an eye on them and it was every 3-4 minutes. I woke Lachy up and said this might be it! He held my hands as I just breathed through them I think it was about 2am, I messaged my birth photographer about 2:40am saying I was having pains but mild for now.
I don’t remember much after that! It went from 0-100 real quick! I got in the shower because laying down didn’t feel good anymore. I was finding it harder to breathe through them and I was getting very vocal! Lachy’s parents and the girls were here so they whisked them away to their house.
The shower started to not feel good so I got out and asked Lachy for the tens machine, I was standing up labouring holding onto the bathroom bench, I would breathe and then scream, my body wanted to move so I was doing all sorts of weird things with my legs! In between contractions I would sip some water and take a breath. Lachy attempted to inflate the birth pool at some point but I couldn’t handle him leaving my side so it didn’t get done and I didn’t care! Standing up was how I wanted to be.
At 3:30 we called the midwives, I was deep into it at this point, I was scared and saying I couldn’t do it and kept saying I was scared. We told Margaret we’d call back but next thing I knew my midwife Rachel walked in just after 4am, Margaret had called her and said she better get here.
Lachy and Rachel were amazing, I felt so supported even though I had no faith in myself. I knew I’d be like this, I hate pain and stress when I’m in pain! They let me be but calmed me down and I knew they were there for me.
Rachel suggested we go downstairs, so Lachy ran ahead and set up a bit (I think). It took me a while to get down the stairs, I was well and truly in active labour when she arrived and they were intense and close. I finally got to the kitchen bench and held on, continuing with the obscure tribal moves and screaming. I remember at this point screaming ‘I just want to SMASH EVERYTHING!’
Rachel asked if I felt a bit pushy and I said yes.
My second midwife Margaret arrived sometime around here, and they guided me to the couch. I got on my knees on the floor and buried my head into the couch and I got in the zone here.
I had Lachy and Margaret on either side and Rachel behind me.
They told me I was getting close and I remember saying ‘You all keep saying that but he’s not coming!’ Rachel said as I’m pushing she could see my membranes, which gave me a little boost because I felt like I was that bit closer, pushed a little harder and my waters broke. Like with Poppy, there was meconium.
I got closer and closer and I loved the pushing stage! I kept my head buried, used the tens and just got it done! Margaret was rubbing my hips and it felt amazing, I remember she took her hand off me and I asked her not to stop! Her voice was calming to me too, a soft relaxing tone that made me feel safe.
Rachel was looking after my perineum with a warm compress, he was coming now and coming fast!! Rachel told me to slow down and breathe him out. The contractions were still hurting me, but as for him coming out, that felt amazing! I don’t really remember feeling a ring of fire just that I was stretching and doing what I dreamed of doing.
His head came out, along with his hands tucked up under his face, 2 minutes later he was born!!! 6:13am on the 6th of December.
I had a moment here, I didn’t reach down for him I just cried into the cushion I couldn’t believe it, I kept thinking oh my god I did it. It was so intense and I felt years of birth trauma from Poppy leave my body, I was overwhelmed and felt reborn as a woman and mother.
I finally reached down and pulled him up between my legs and sobbed. The most amazing, empowering, incredible moment of my life! Birthing my baby at home with the most amazing support team I could have ever wished for!
I then got on the couch and had my baby on my chest with everyone telling me how amazing I was, and I truly felt it! He latched on to feed instantly and I lay there in awe of the whole experience. I felt like he was tiny but they were all commenting on how big he was. He had a long, thick cord with a true knot in it.
Not too long after I birthed the placenta and Lachy cut the cord. Lachy had skin to skin cuddles with Buddy and I then walked to the toilet and decided to shower while I was there. Rachel got my robe and I went back to the couch and my baby was on my chest again. We all had toast and tea and it was lovely. About 2 hours after his birth he was weighed, just shy of 4kg and 56cm long.
The midwives left and Lachy and I went to our bed and snuggled our baby. I couldn’t sleep I was on such a high!
Buddy James Kinnaird
6/12/21
6:13am
8lb12
